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Government
Our Forgotten Honor: A Memorial Day Reflection
by
Tim Willard
I remember not liking him at first. I was an eighteen year-old know-it-all with a weak jump shot; he was a six-foot-something, glasses-wearing dad who out-played everyone in the church gym that Monday night. I don’t remember much of the game, but he stuck in my brain. He never seemed to tire, and never quit smiling.
Afterwards, my father told me the wiry man was a doctor and Army reservist named Mark Connelly. I was surprised that he was a physician, but more surprised that he felt compelled to serve our country by caring for the wounded.
After that night, I never saw Dr. Connelly again.
Weeks later, my mother called to tell me that Dr. Connelly was killed in action during the Gulf War. He had just called home to talk to his family and was on his way back to base when disaster struck. His wife and two children survive him.
His memorial service was one of the most powerful I’ve attended. The community dearly loved him and our church congregation seemed to heave from the loss. Pastor and Army Colonel Jerry Young led the service, charged with remembering and burying a husband, father, professional and brother-in-arms. I have never forgotten the tears that fell that day.
Many years later, Dr. Mark Connelly’s memory returns as I begin planning my family’s Memorial Day picnic. My two small daughters will play in the sprinkler and my in-laws will help grill the burgers and prepare the salad. We will celebrate our life together, eat a bit too much and plant some herbs.
As I reflected on what this holiday actually means, I happened to look at Floyd’s house next door. This middle-aged Jersey native who attends church on Sunday and loves his three grown daughters has lined his entire yard with American flags. He is thankful—thankful for the men and women who paid the ultimate price for our burgers and fries and Cokes and gardens and the ability to live with little regard for our security and safety.
I know it’s increasingly unpopular to show Christian pride of country. I’ve discussed with young leaders whether or not it is appropriate to recognize holidays like Memorial Day and Independence Day in our churches. I’m often astonished at the growing lack of honor some display toward our veterans. For us who sacrifice little—if anything—and yet have no qualms about enjoying the luxury and freedom provided by this country we belie our lack of gratitude with our cavalier attitudes toward the mixture of faith and country. Have we grown so pious?
I find myself offering disclaimers to statements that might be misunderstood as too patriotic, and I certainly don’t fly the colors on my front porch. After all, I’m a citizen of heaven, right?
This weekend I took some time to look at some familiar passages in Scripture. In Romans 13, I was reminded how the Apostle Paul urged the 1st century Christians to be good citizens, living in submission to the God-established rulers. In verses such as Isaiah 40:15, Daniel 2:12 and Proverbs 8:15,16, I was struck by the overwhelming notion that God holds all kings and kingdoms under his sovereign rule.
I know the debate surrounding Christians in the military or even Christians celebrating holidays of a supposed imperial government will not be solved in this forum. But I do believe one thing can be remedied: our Christian spirit. The underlying citizen-ethic in Scripture is submission and humility, an ethic modeled by the centurion in Luke 7:1-10 and Christ himself before Pilate.
Waving a flag or observing a moment of silence on this “Day of Decoration” (as it was formerly called in 1868) does not imply support for every American initiative, both foreign and domestic. It simply honors the men and women who have given their lives serving their fellow citizens and for those who daily fight to protect something they believe serves the common good of all humankind: freedom.
Dr. Mark Connelly’s commitment to the good of others in a time of war makes me shudder. His memory shames me for all the times I withhold honor from those who deserve it. I wonder if this Memorial Day we can find the space in our picnics and parties and hipster theology to observe a moment of silence for the Mark Connelly’s of the world. Let us raise our glasses and in thankful chorus toast the lives of those made our day-off so special.
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Do you agree with Tim that Christians have developed a stigma when it comes to anything that smacks of "nationalism?" Do you have reservations about celebrating Memorial Day or Independence Day or even displaying an American flag in church?
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Comments
Andy C
Great post Tim! I think we Christians are developing a stigma for anything that may seem politically incorrect even if absolutely biblically accurate. We should honor our faith and the faith of others in the Lord, we should honor service and sacrifice of those who are doing their duty and often giving their lives to protect others.
God bless those who honor service that has such great sacrifice at times.They say their are no atheists in foxholes. There probably aren't many politicians either.
carol Hargett
Greater Love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.
Justin Edgar
Good post, I do find myself conflicted on Memorial Day and other nationalistic holidays. This post reminded me to be thankful for the men and women who have sacrificed their lives. I don't think this means that we let our churches become places that allow nationalistic pride to have a place, but I do think we can pray a prayer of thanksgiving for those who have died and for those families who give so much. I think we can and should be good citizens, knowing our true citizenship is in a better country.
Tim Archer
There's certainly nothing wrong with remembering those who have suffered from the horrors of war, nor of honoring the sacrificial spirit of many. Yet, wouldn't the Christian spirit call for us to show equal concern and honor for all those killed, be they enemies, bystanders or people bearing arms in the name of the nation we live in?
Sharon
Why do we spend so much time mourning those great soldiers who have perished in our wars and so little time mourning those innocent civilians who've died as a result of them? Just a thought.
Quentin Todd
As a New Zealander, reading this post, I am struck by two things: compassion and idolatry.
First, compassion. This is a heart heaved understanding by God's revelation, that we are simply human. To see one's countrymen and women off to war is by the long shot a very courageous act. Compassion and respect is the outworking of God's Grace in-which is his soul. While it is worthy of respect to honor one who has died in battle, it is another to disrespect the dead. I honor Americans who died for us all in the free world for a cause that baffles many. If the evil of terrorism were conquered, then this kind of war would disappear - but then, that's not the reality. Terrorism is the new front of battle that we must engage spiritually and unfortunately, physically. I absolutely hate what it is doing to us all. But how else do we deal with this?
As Christians, we have to chose wisely our decisions and I for one, am going to intercessory prayer to gain understanding this deeply complex issue because of my second point: Idolatry
This idolatry is where you worship something other than God. It is a fantasy welding emotion grab on a good conscience. It is the worse way to respect and a sure way of showing the 'world' that Jesus loves flags that represent war and violence. I believe Americans who love their flag more, ought to understand that Christ is not being worshiped when you respect an honour not worthy of respect. Nationalism is the key word. You can love your country but be mindful you don't worship Nationalism because you won't be showing the Grace of God to anyone. Flag honouring is a dangerous precedent to a kind of violence in the guise of national outrage that does not respect Biblical morality.
I respect Americans who have gone to Iraq, died there, honour them for their courage but that's as far I can go. If I were an American, I cannot get emotional over nationalism by the flags - it is pure idolatry. An arrogance that shows no [respect or] compassion for the enemy on the battlefield.
Wes Roberts
...I enjoy what happens mysteriously in our neighborhood every Memorial Day which keeps even an olde man of 69 focused...mentioned here:
http://wesroberts.typepad.com/wes/2011/05/remembering-is-hard-some-times.html
Sue Marsden
Thank you for your article. I am sitting in the hospital with my 88 year old father. After reading your article, I thanked him for serving our country. He said, "Thank you. You are the first of my children to ever say that." Thanks to all of the veterans who are reading this!
Rob
As an Australian of European extraction I feel sad - sad for the men who have been killed/wounded/scarred defending Aus and the US and sad for those human beings they killed/wounded/scarred. I do think we should remember but only so we can mourn. Christians seem hopelessly trapped by the modern nation state political imagination and its demands that we kill other human beings on its behalf. And we seem unable to re-imagine a different story, a story shaped by the gospel of the Prince of Peace. In the words of William Cavanuagh "Politics is a practice of the imagination…. We are often fooled by the seeming solidarity of the materials of politics, its armies and offices, into forgetting that these materials are marshalled by acts of the imagination. How does a provincial farm boy become persuaded that he must travel as a soldier to another part of the world and kill people he knows nothing about? He must be convinced of the reality of borders, and imagine himself deeply, mystically, united to a wider national community that stops abruptly at those borders. The nation-state is… one important and historically contingent type of ‘imagined community’ around which our conceptions of politics tend to gather… This little book is an exercise in a different kind of political imagination, one that is rooted in the Christian story"
Patti
Great reflections on this Memorial Day Tim and a fitting tribute to Dr. Connelly and his family!
PJ Connelly
Tim, thank you for your beautiful words regarding my late husband, Mark Connelly. He was a wonderful man and strong Christian.
JS
To be honest, I've never really encountered any Christian movement against "nationalistic" holidays, or being "too patriotic". I think you can be a "citizen of heaven" and still be proud, grateful, and passionate about the nation God has given us to live in. I don't idolize America, but I surely do thank God that I was born here. And probably not nearly as often as I should. I think sometimes Christians take for granted the fact that we can worship openly without the very real fear of death or imprisonment. I don't think Christians in America REALLY know what a gift we have to be able to worship freely. So if for no other reason than to thank the Lord for seeing fit to make me a citizen of a nation that He saw fit to create, and to thank Him for the relatively easy life of worship we lead, and to thank those who have made the ultimate sacrifice so that the country that God made, which I live in, can continue to worship Him freely, I will openly and proudly celebrate "nationalistic" holidays. But I'm celebrating my God and savior, not politics.
EBP
I am NOT CONFLICTED AT ALL at all when it comes to celebrating our freedom and honoring those who died and sacrificed to make it possible.
"I know it’s increasingly unpopular to show Christian pride of country. I’ve discussed with young leaders whether or not it is appropriate to recognize holidays like Memorial Day and Independence Day in our churches. I’m often astonished at the growing lack of honor some display toward our veterans. For us who sacrifice little—if anything—and yet have no qualms about enjoying the luxury and freedom provided by this country we belie our lack of gratitude with our cavalier attitudes toward the mixture of faith and country. Have we grown so pious?" quoted from above
I am a young leader and have pastored (and started) more than a few churches here in America. I love Jesus and worship Him with all of my heart - I am a citizen of heaven and I do not worship flags nor armies. But I do honor with tears the sacrifice of fallen men and women.
It is hard for me to understand the difficulty that young Christians have of honoring those who have fallen. Maybe we have grown pious.
Do you enjoy the freedoms this country offers?
Do you enjoy the freedom with which you worship?
Do you enjoy the incredible bounty that we have here?
When I honor the fallen, it does not mean I agree with every invasion, with every military assignment given, nor even some of the recent wars in which we are engaged. But I honor the soldier who thirsts and bleeds and dies for freedom.
I say worship God Almighty and His Son Jesus alone - but honor those whom He used to accomplish the freedoms we enjoy. It is not that complicated to me.
Angie Greene Castleberry
On this, our observance of Veteran's Day, Dr Mark's memory was laid on my heart. My family and I were stationed at Ft Benning, GA with his beautiful family during the mid 80's. They lived right around the corner, their backyard linking with ours and myself being the "neighborhood clutz", my mother would limp me over to the Connelly's often. I am so proud Dr Mark is remembered and honored. I will never forget the time and attention he always gave me and my ever-occuring ailments. He never made me feel like an imposition, nor did his loving wife PJ (even when we would barge in during their mealtimes). He served his Lord, his family and his country proudly. I honor him today with relishing in the sweet memories I have of a Christian man whose devoted family made a profound impact on my life.
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